If there is ever anything like suffering that is worth it, it's being with her. She is not why he has troubles with these things, but she is why he will work hard to overcome them. He just isn't sure he can. Just like he's no more sure he could overcome being Dirtyhands.

Those words do run through his hand. Just as they were leaving in the moments he remembered, going off on their paths, living their lives, and not needing him as part of them there either. Why would they need him here, after all?

He knows he tenses but he's not sure if it's noticeable. He's spent so much of his life tense, is it that noticeable?

They are words that do bolster him, but then he has a rough mind, rougher thoughts, and hateful small voices making him wonder if it's possible both of those things are true. They don't need him but they're there for him. He would go on without them, but he's already found himself withdrawing from others because he isn't ready to start trusting new people.

Would he come to have to do the same here as well?

"I could make this place ours," he says, words he feels stronger in. A place he knows and is comfortable.